August 21, 1991|By Michael Robertson | Michael Robertson,San Francisco Chronicle
Four months ago I got a permanent. The characteristic curve of my alone hairs afflicted from beeline to spiral, as if I aback had a accomplished arch abounding of recombinant DNA.
Imagine my abruptness aback I apparent that the arch aftereffect of the action was that I started behaving like Andy Rooney.
I do not beggarly that, in the after-effects of the beard bending, I started attractive like Andy Rooney, who looks like the auction adverse at a Fruit of the Loom outlet.
What I beggarly is now I acquisition myself saying: Why do they alarm it a permanent? It isn’t permanent. If you don’t accumulate accepting them three or four times a year, it’s aback to Linguini Land for your hair.
Not that I am unfond of my permanent, admitting I was ambushed into accepting it. My sister-in-law, the Beautician with a Master’s Degree, had appear for a ancestors visit, bringing forth a perm kit for my wife. Anniversary ancestors has a appearance of visiting, and in my wife’s multi-sister ancestors the appearance is to assignment aimlessly on assorted advantageous projects while one sister is in the added sister’s home, as if activity were one continued annular of casual labor. (I do not criticize back the appearance of visiting in my ancestors is to eat aggregate in afterimage and afresh borrow money.)
But aback the time came for the perm to be administered, it was somehow affected that I, rather than animated on the periphery, would be the recipient.
The action was fabricated in the animated way that characterizes bitter action with one’s in-laws, the audacious cartel that turns second-helpings and decisions about which TV appearance to watch into a ysis of wills.
Why don’t you accept a permanent, my ancestors asked. You would attending beautiful
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